Forgiveness

Someone said to me yesterday that forgiveness is not a one time thing, someone hurts you or do you wrong you forgive them and it does not end there. The hurt and the pain will come back to you again, then you forgive them again. a continuous process!

Days before winter

Rays of morning sun
shining through the window,
her thick long hair fall on my face,
I smell them,her fragrance fills me.

rays of morning sun
lost among the leafless autumn trees
I joyfully feel her,her hair caught in the cold breeze,
I run my fingers along her back,
her lovely back!

as she closes her eyes, her dark blue eyes.
she wears a smile on her face looking down
i hear her occasional chuckles,
and she pull her slender navel inwards,
her slender navel!

As I lay softly caressing her on that cold morning
with the sun’s mellow shine and cold breeze rushing in
I love life, I love my surroundings,
I respect everything I have in this eternal moment.
for the dark cold winter months that are to follow
don't bother me, the sadness of my life doesn't bother me.

rays of morning sun
shining though the window
I hear her chuckles, I fondle her
and I am relishing my life.

Wood Cutter

Sometimes we loose faith in people. This happens to be sometimes, you just cant depend people to give the output you expect from them. Lately I been researching on Positive thinking and I think I have found one of the solutions. You need to concentrate on the positive side of the peoples, just keep concentrating on that and you wont be disappointed.
I also saw a documented called "The Secrets" which says about laws of attraction, it says your thoughts attracts the situation from your thoughts. It reminded me of a short story I have learned when I was a child.

A wood cutter goes into the forest in search of woods, he walks quite deep into the forest and finds a tree suitable for him. He feels happy and starts cutting the tree. Time passes fast and the sun starts to go down. Woodcutter notices that sun went down and he started worrying if he would get lost on the way back. He finish off the work and start back, and in the dark he gets lost. Then he decides to stay the night near a tree, he makes a small fire and settles down. He is little worried and he starts to get thoughts like what if it rains now, the fire will go away and he cant be safe there. Soon the rain starts pouring and he fire is extinguished.He is frightened and starts to think everything is going wrong with him. He thinks, what if a tiger comes, he will be in danger. Soon a tiger appears and he climbs up the tree. Sitting on top of the tree, looking down the tiger he starts to pray for his life. Suddenly the revelation strikes him that its was his thoughts that materialized, he starts to understand the power of thoughts. He starts to think that the tiger goes away, a positive thought. And soon the tiger goes away.
Moral : Thoughts are powerful, make it positive and live life positively

Dairy entry on May 30th

Through my window i see the painted prague
the red painted roof top of prague
the blue and dark mix of rain clouds

through my window i see the water colored prague
through my windo i wonder,how long it last

I was doing a photoshoot of swimmers
i was asking this swimmer to move and model in a certina position
he got everything wrong, i am ask him again

he is in the middle of the pool and may be he cant hear me
i jump into the pool and show him how to pose correctly
and a sudden realization comes that i dont know swiming
and i drown
i jump awake from my sleep. I slept away in the afternnon
I had a photoshoot in the early morning with swimers
i had to wake up at 5.30
and i had a shoot in the evening, and i dirfted of to sleep in afternoon
I look through my window to see prague.

Open Window

Its going to rain. The sky is crowded with dark clouds, some sun light from far away sun can be seen, and the suffocating in between the dark and think rain clouds. The overcast over Prague city was hinting at something inevitable. I could very well imagine this as a perfect setting for a dark fantasy movie, where there is not time for anything, no time for dinner, no time for anger, no time for love, you can only RUN for your life. Or on second thought the best suited would be a scene from the Russian novel, Master and Margaretta. When the devil is out, the sky is overcast and he likes dark humor. I opened my window towards the street, i live on the top floor of my 4 story building near Charles bridge. May be i Margaretta is flying on the broom somewhere in the city, and if by chance she fly through my street i didnt want to miss a chance to see her.

May be the spring is late, but winter is definitely over, i could say that from the nice breeze coming from my open window. today is Sunday, I just counted, i had conversation with 6 people today, like in i spoke to 6 people more than one sentence today. Many things would be happening in this world as i write this, many people would be in many parts of the world doing many different stuff as i write. As i write the breeze is flowing into my room softly and I await to see Margaretta on her Broom.

Yellow Lamp

Sometimes you wait for things in life that never arrive... like a letter. The hope which started with a warm summer day, which now the razor sharp winter is freezing my tiny drops of hopes into icicles.

A friend today wrote to me that she hates Sundays because for her, a Sunday is death of the weekend. Very interesting view, I wonder if its a natural
death or a murder.

Another friend has a big yellow lamp in her living room,the bright warm light from the lamp glows from the corner of room like a sun,but tender invisible rays.
The lamp was the first thing that i noticed when i entered the room, there were three other people in room on a cosy sofa. All three were soaked in the yellow light.

Over wine we had many pleasant and deep conversations, at one point I realized I was slipping away into my own thoughts of the people that mattered to me the most,after she made her statement. She said

"When i moved to Prague, i was lonely. Yes its true the buildings,architecture, atmosphere everything is enjoyable, but for me a town or an island is
just an town or an island until I start to connect with the people, until i meet people whom I could connect with, until then the island or city is inhabited. I like
Prague now because of the people i know here, its inhabitants, people make me and life is people"

I made a recollection of the people i valued in random, the people whom i care, people with whom i like to spend time together, and i realized they are
far away from me. Life is people, i repeated after her. I took my stare away from the lamp and everyone seems to be waiting for a comment from me after my
deep thought, I looked at the lamp again, i wondered if the lamp is emitting positive energy. I felt good just with recalling the people i care, the people i embrace with love,i felt good, "life is people" i nodded in agreement.

I wondered if i could dip my hands into the warm glow of light and paint everyone yellow.

Rejuvenation of Nameless Things.

Its been days I have been thinking of this blog, waiting for a start, a subject to start writing again, and yes some nameless things have inspired me.


SNOW IS MELTING.

I walk out to the narrow cobblestone streets of Prague, the sky is
bright and the snow is melting.
The innocent white mask of Prague is melting away to reveal its vicious face.
I walk through the cold wet grounds among hundreds of tourists. my
friend used to tell me that
when you are in a group, you loose individuality but i never agreed to his view.
the most differences of a person is revealed when they are in a
group,with a keen eye you can
see everyone is different, each tourist in a group is different, with
their own ambitions, their own
problems,their own curious ways to explore the new city. However they
might all be running away
from something,but not the same.

I finally manage to get a seat in the restaurant near the buffet
section, i choose to order instead
of buffet. While i waited for my food, my thoughts wandered away to
the girl far,far away, who
failed to keep her promises to write me letters. I tried to imagine
her day, but with so less
details she told me , it was impossible. Chattering of 5 beautiful
women gang distracted my thoughts,
all of them dressed in business formals and they took the table next
to me. Their elegant behavior and style
suggested they worked as executives. All of the girls were above
average with their looks and watching
them though the course of my meal, i realized one thing, the only time
when a beautiful woman
gets deceived by her beauty is when they are choosing what to eat.

One of the girls in black suite got up and came over to choose her
meal, her happy pretty face she
had at the table was gone, she had the sharp look of hunter,her face
muscles were stiff, the mask she wore
earlier was lost unconsciously revealing her mean looks. All the 5
above average girl's faces had almost the
same level of change, from pretty beauty to cunning. I imagined my
letter friend in black suit walking over to
choose her meal, she see the color of the dish, may be read whats
written under the dishes, unconsciously
waving her fingers,tilting her head to look at the same dish in
different angles, and finally choosing something
which is the strangest to her, may be something like "Dead lovers"

There are many kinds of people you meet,I dont know all of them, but
surely there is one kind where you know from the start,
there is no mask to them, there might be a lot to know and learn
about them, but you get an assurance from the first meeting that
everything is going to be fine and may be
it is this thought which make me very comfortable with them and more
attracted to simple human beings!

After the meal, I walk out to the narrow cobblestone streets of
prague, to the hundreds of tourists. And the snow is melting!